Alone
by DirtySpecs
Summary: "My heart aches for you, Vegeta. It's awful that in all our time together it is at a time like this when I finally let my barriers down enough to let you know that I love you. I'll never forget you, and I will miss you every single day of my life." Rated K plus for some swearing. B/V


**Alone.**

**A;U/ **Hi Guys, if you haven't read by bio then please do, that's where my formal introduction is. Here I would like to mention that I do not own Dragon Ball Z, or any of the songs in this story. I hope you kind of enjoy it, not completely considering it's not very jolly. Well it's not at all.  
I'm already thinking about my next one.

**Summary; "**My heart aches for you, Vegeta. It's awful that in all our time together it is at a time like this when I finally let my barriers down enough to let you know that I love you. I'll never forget you, and I will miss you every single day of my life." B/V

It was a grey day, almost as though the weather knew the pain that they were all feeling. No birds sang, no angry people stuck in traffic beeped their horn. Nothing stirred, everything was perfectly quiet.  
She lay there in her bed, her head on his pillow and every single curtain in their house was closed. She had been mourning for just under a week now and today was the day she had to say goodbye. The truth hadn't hit her yet, she still felt like she was going to wake up any minute, but the pain she felt right was worse than any pinch possible.  
She noticed as she stepped slowly out of bed and made her way to the mirror, that all of the pictures of him were faced down. Her eyes were dark, and her blue hair was limp and lifeless. She already had her outfit planned and prepared hanging on the back of her bedroom door. As she sat there in the chair facing the mirror she though back to the day before their wedding.

_She sat there in her new underwear, it was a pearly white colour, it was the whole shebang, the suspender belt, the full bra, garter, stockings. Had it not been her bridal underwear it could look a little slutty. It had just arrived back from the dry cleaners and she just had to try it all on again. She was looking at herself in the mirror, her silk robe draped over her shoulders and onto the back of the arm chair. Using her make up brush to blend in her blusher to hide her pale white skin, looking at her pearl earrings sat neatly in the box.  
He stood in the doorway just looking at her. He admired that women. She made him try on his suit to make sure that everything would go according to plan.  
He cleared his throat and she spun round, her hair in rollers. He smiled, not smirked, but smiled into her ocean blue eyes.  
"Woman,"  
"Don't ruin this moment Vegeta-"  
"I was going to say… you look amazing." He loosened his tie and undid a couple of his buttons on his shirt, "Now, can I take of this ridiculously expensive outfit? Yes?" He smirked at her.  
"You should take a shower, wash off all that sexy you've got on." She smiled  
"Wow Woman, you never have been good at dirty talk."_

She stared at the door framed and wished so hard that he'd be back there. In the bathrobe she got him for Christmas. His flushed cheeks from running the hot water for too long, his hair flat and his eyes tired. He always used to stand there arms folded looking at her getting ready for the day, too tired to be his usual ridiculous self. She blinked back the tears and slowly applied her lipstick.

If she had just 10 more minutes with him she would cherish every second. She would tell him all the things she was too proud to admit. In the years they were together they always battled their feelings for one another, neither one of them wanted to appear weak in front of the other. Yet every night when he thought she was asleep he would roll over, his hand finding her waist so perfectly and smell her hair. She'd lay there awake, with a beaming smile on her face and listen to the sweet nothings he whispered to her, things he would die if he ever knew she heard even one word of it.

_He found her ear, the room was quiet. His hand slowly felt up from her thigh up to her tiny waist, his touch as soft and light as a feather. Treating her so delicately.  
"I love you, woman."_

Her hand felt her waist and she closed her eyes as she thought back, every night without fail he would show the real him. The one no one, not even Goku would have seen. Thinking back and remembering the closest she ever got to saying it back was on their wedding day when she told him that he meant the world to him. He smiled.

She curled her hair, slowly. Thinking about how everything in her room, their room, their house reminded her of him. The bed; the place they lay every night, the time she wanted to change the room around and they ended up on the floor laughing at one another. Him getting angry that she couldn't lift it, and her dropping it on his toe, his flushed face pretending that it didn't hurt. The lamp they had to replaced countless times when she slammed the door so hard in an argument and it fell down. The dresser where they first made love after their wedding ceremony. The hall way where they argued on colour theme and where to hang the canvases. The kitchen, home of arguments every dinner time when she wanted healthy and he wanted quick. The lounge where they would lay with the fire going and she would fall asleep on his chest and he would carry her up their grand staircase and up to bed on those cold winter nights. The barbeque in the garden, where he took control of the cooking and all their friends gathered around the pool. The driveway, the time when she reversed into the back of his pride and joy and he was so confused as to how he should react he ended up laughing. The tree in the garden where the birds would sing in the summer and they would sit and talk about the future; about babies and holidays.

She pushed all the thoughts to the back of her mind and put on her tailored black dress, with the deep 'V' back, put on her fascinator which covered her eyes with black mesh, put her tissues in her clutch bag and placed on her black thick heeled shoes.

"_You know Woman, if you didn't spend so much fucking money on shoes we would be able to get the training gym I've been wanting for so long!"  
"You have a fucking gym, Vegeta! What, you don't want me to look nice?"  
"Why do you even need to look nice? You're not gunna get much better than me! You don't do much outside the house."  
"I'm not going to get much better? Well then there is still a chance isn't there? Perhaps I should go and find one. You know I heard Yamcha just got out of a long relationship, I've always liked the way his one eyebrow raises when he's nervous."  
"You make me sick, Woman!"  
"You make ME sick, MAN!"_

_She clip clapped down the stairs and she sniffed, she liked to make an effort, it was what attracted him to her in the first place._

"Woman!" He bellowed down the stairs and she stopped dead in her tracks, her arm already extended ready to turn the door knob to get into her car.

"_What do you want now Vegeta? Not finished insulting me yet?"_

_He rushed down to meet her at the door, and gave her the most breathtakingly romantic kiss, better than the first one they exchanged at prom. She knew this was his way of an apology,_

"_Now why don't you take off those shameful shoes and meet me upstairs?"  
"Because I'm late and I'm still pissed with you." She folded her arms, like a spoilt child.  
"If you leave here on an argument, things get worse. You used to always say that at school."  
"Well things change when you get out of school Vegeta."  
"Not really."  
He pulled her hand so she spun around, threw her up over his shoulder and carried her back upstairs. She didn't smile, but she was relieved she had found him._

She didn't buy new shoes for this occasion, he finally won. She had more than enough shoes to keep her going through every outfit and promised that she was going to donate all of her extra money to build a gym for the community.

The door knocked as she reached the bottom step of the stairs and the limo was waiting outside for her. It was due to start in the next 45 minutes and she needed to start going. As she sat down in the car she thought back to her last conversation with Vegeta.

"_I'm going out woman, you cannot control me. Stop being so pathetic!"  
"It's our fucking anniversary Vegeta, I forbid to go out sparring on our anniversary!"  
"You forbid me? Who the fuck are you kidding?"  
"If you go out then just know that I will hate you for as long as you live! You fucking bastard! I made reservations for later and sorted out amazing couple things for us to do all day! I wake up and you're ready to go in that fucking outfit. You'd rather spend time with Goku than me, on an occasion which CLEARLY means a lot to me then FINE VEGETA! GO!" She slammed the bathroom door, "I KNEW you NEVER cared about ME."_

_He stormed up the stairs, every footstep felt like the house was shaking._

"_I am going out, WOMAN! Because I MADE PLANS! I have all FUCKING night to do the STUPID SHIT that you always try and make me do. I have ONE day off this WEEK and I am NOT spending it with MUD on my FUCKING face while you try and KID YOURSELF into thinking that we are the perfect COUPLE!"  
"Well call me crazy for wanting to spend time with my HUSBAND on the day that we're supposed to celebrate the best day in our FUCKING lives! You're right. We're not perfect, we're not even a couple! We're just two people who share a fucking bed and happen to wear matching rings! Fuck IT! Fuck YOU! FUCK US!"  
She picked up the first thing she found on her dresser, which happened to be nail scissors and threw them straight towards his head, he dodged it and his eyes quickly changed from concerned for his safety to fuming mad.  
"Are you trying to fucking kill me, psycho bitch!"  
Bulma hadn't even realised what she had thrown and she was grabbing other items including her glass jewellery box in preparation to throw at him. He grabbed her arm hard, maybe a bit too hard. She gasped and went to try and bite his hand.  
"Why are you acting like a fucking animal? It's one day! One fucking day WOMAN!"  
"You would never understand." Her wet eyelashes looked up at him, "I hate you!" She whimpered.  
"You tell me that more than anything else, and as I have told you before; you're a shit liar!" He pulled her arms and wrapped them around him, "I'm not going out with Kakkorot. I was going to pick up some flowers and a cake that the Wench emailed me about this morning to deliver them to your surprise party. But I had to tell you to prevent the four words that would tear me apart."  
"What are they?"  
"I want a divorce."  
"Don't be ridiculous Vegeta!" She kissed him and apologised for throwing the scissors, and he kissed her hand where his finger prints were in red from grabbing her a little too hard._

She touched her arm, it turned into a bruise but it was fading now. She was relieved that she opted for water proof mascara because she was finding it so hard to battle her tears, and be the strong person that Vegeta always saw.

The driver asked her if she wanted any music and she said to put the radio on, she sat there and listened to the DJ introduce the top 20 songs of the week and a broken smile filled her face.

I lose my way  
And it's not too long before you point it out  
I cannot cry  
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes  
I'm forced to fake  
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life  
My heart can't possibly break  
When it wasn't even whole to start with

_The ice was thick and Bulma thought it to be the perfect time for her and Vegeta to take their romantic walk and introduce themselves to the neighbours they have rudely ignored for the past 3 or 4 months of living there.  
"This is fucking ridiculous! How can something that looks so fluffy, be so cold?"  
"Oh Vegeta, it's snow. It's beautiful! How can you hate it? Put on the Hunters welly boots I got you the other day, one of those hats and a nice warm coat and you'll be fine."  
"A hat?" He stared at her blankly, "You want me to put a fucking hat over my head?"  
Bulma was creased with laughter, "You could flatten it down…" She continued laughing, "Oh my GOD! You're going to look like a garden gnome!"  
"Fuck you Woman, I'm not going."  
Bulma tried to silence her laugh, "Okay, I'm sorry you big jerk. How can I go on a romantic walk by myself? Don't be silly please, can we just go? We will be back in like half an hour tops. We can grab a Starbucks and then snuggle in front of the fire."_

He didn't like the idea but he rolled his eyes and put on another pair of gloves before facing the freezing temperatures, for his woman. It wasn't long before Bulma fell down, her foot slipped down a hole and she couldn't get up.

"_Vegeta, help me please?" At first there was laughter in her voice, but as soon as Vegeta pulled her up and she saw that he knee was dislocated she panicked. "Oh my god it hurts so bad! So much for fucking romantic. I need to go to the emergency room!"  
"Stop going on like a banshee will you?" Vegeta carried her like he carried her over the threshold of their front door after their wedding all the way to the hospital.  
"You know woman, I thought you would have been crying like a baby."  
"I'm stronger than you think Veggie."  
'Don't I know it.' He thought to himself as he looked out the window and into the white surrounding._

_They were stuck in the hospital for four days waiting tests and getting her cast put on and Vegeta didn't leave her sight once. Granted he wouldn't let anyone else in to see her which she was annoyed about but he slept in the most uncomfortable arm chair, had to steal extra towels from the nurses station during the hand over on night shift. Had a massive go at the doctor who mistakenly told him that visiting hours were over and practically beat up the mail nurse who said he was getting help her with her shower.  
He helped her hobble out of be, helped her wash without even thinking about the fact that she was naked in front of him pretty helpless. He was everything she could ever want in a man. A husband._

Because of you  
I never stray too far from the sidewalk  
Because of you  
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt  
Because of you  
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me  
Because of you  
I am afraid

They arrived at the church and she for the first time saw him in the casket. The flowers were everywhere; on top of the car, on the coffin, besides the coffin, all over the floor, everyone was holding a bunch, they lined the whole church and there were more awaiting him near his grave.

"How you holding up, B?" Chi Chi was waiting her arrival and opened the door to the limo for her as soon as the car stopped.

Bulma said nothing, she smiled and nodded. She felt her nostrils flair like she was going to cry but she looked up at the sky to stop her tears from flowing.

Goku and Tien were amongst the people who carried the coffin, Goku couldn't even look at her face. His best friend was gone and there was nothing he could do about it. He couldn't even offer any comfort to his wife, the girl he grew up with who he knew from when they were kids because he'd be the one to cry first. Bulma was being so strong. She stood up, put her shoulders back and began to slowly walk behind her husband into the chapel. No one else had entered, everyone went back in very slowly behind her as the music began.

Another turning point a fork stuck in the road  
Time grabs you by the wrist directs you where to go  
So make the best of this test and don't ask why  
It's not a question but a lesson learned in time

It's something unpredictable but in the end  
It's right I hope you've had the time of your life

So take the photographs and still frames in your mind  
Hang it on a shelf in good health and good time  
Tattoos and memories and dead skin on trial  
For what it's worth it was worth all the while

As everybody was in the church, they all stood to in front of their seats awaiting the final chorus to end. A few people from school were dapping their cheeks with worn tissues. Chi Chi sat in the isle behind Bulma, she was a mess. Goku lay the coffin down on the stand and rubbed the tears away with both hands on his face. Bulma allowed one tear to stroll down her face and fall down into her lap. She sat in the first isle alone, it was planned that way. She didn't want any fuss, she needed to be strong for her husband. She could let her guard down when she was home and the door was locked.

It's something unpredictable but in the end  
it's right I hope you had the time of your life.

As the song ended the male priest stood up tall and gave Bulma a nod.

"Let us commend Vegeta Ouji-Briefs to the mercy of God. It is now that we say the Lord's prayer, Our father who art in heaven;  
Hallowed by Thy Name;  
thy kingdom come;  
thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven;  
Give us this day our daily bread;  
And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us;  
And lead us not into temptation;  
But deliver us from evil;  
For Thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever and ever;  
Amen"

Everyone echoed him "Amen."

"I have spoken to Bulma and Goku, his wife and best friend in preparation for this day; the day that God accepts back one of his men, and have learnt that Vegeta was most definitely an individual." She room allowed a small chuckle, "He was a man who knew what he wanted and most certainly did not allow anything, or one get in his way. He was adored by those who knew him well, not because of typical things but because of one main factor of what truly makes a wonderful person; his loyalty. He was a faithful and lawful man, he had a tough exterior but his heart only beat for the people whom he treasured most such as Bulma and Goku. It is unfortunate that we have to say goodbye to someone who has impacted everyone's lives in such a unique and memorable way, but God has higher plans and as we all know; he only takes the best. Although according to Vegeta's belief so I have learned from Bulma where he said that crying was a weakness, I can say that crying is the body's way of accepting and helping you heal and mourn. You are amongs the strongest of friend groups I have seen in many of my years and you should in no way feel that you are betraying Dear Vegeta by allowing yourself to grief." He gave a smile to Goku, who mentioned to him before that he thought it was important for Bulma to cry.

"I lead you know into a prayer selected from his wonderful wife, Bulma. If you please turn to page two and read with me 'God be in my head.'  
God be in my head,  
and in my understanding  
God be in my eyes,  
and in my looking;  
God be in my mouth,  
and in my speaking;  
God be in my heart,  
and in my thinking;  
God be at my end,  
and at my departing.  
Amen"

Again everyone echoed "Amen."

"We are now going to have some words from Goku." The priest took a seat and crossed his leg over to allow him the space.

Goku slowly got up to the stand and pulled out a piece of paper from his top left pocket.

"I'm not usually good at this kind of stuff, and believe me this wasn't the easiest of things to write. At first I couldn't accept it, my friend, my brother was gone. When I first met Vegeta we were no older than five; in our first year of school. He had a pretty hard life, he trusted me with how he felt and to this day V," He touched the coffin, "I have never told anyone the stuff you let me in on. He was the man with a plan, he was untouchable. There was such an air of mystery around my buddy and he kept everyone guessing but no body could have imagined that you would be taken. If you were here now you'd say something along the lines of 'get some balls Kakkorot, he's dead; put a flower on his grave and have a fucking beer' but I owe you this. Chi found this poem and I think it is pretty suited, imagine it said quite roughly; Do not stand at my grave and weep; I am not there. I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints on snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain, I am the gentle autumn rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush, I am the swift uplifting rush, Of quiet birds in circles flight. I am the soft stars that shine at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry; I am not there, I did not die. I promise you Vegeta, I will protect and honour your wife. I will protect her in the same way that I would protect my own. She is family, you are family and the memory of you and everything you stand for will never be forgotten. Not in my, nor Bulma's house. Rest in peace bud, save me a seat." Goku folded the paper back up, gave the coffin a kiss, lay down on there a single rose and allowed himself to cry on his journey back to his seat

_It was the second to last day at school and Bulma was running late. Vegeta was eagerly awaiting her in class to ask her to go to the Graduation Ball. She was speeding along the road when something ran In front of her. She swerved and hit a tree, her face hit the horn and it continued to blast. Goku was walking past and saw Bulma, bloody coming from her nose knocked out on the steering wheel. He immediately rang Vegeta who ran to her aid. Goku was frozen still in fear, he couldn't get close. Vegeta rode in the ambulance with her, and Goku followed behind in the car with Bunny, her mother._

"_What the fuck were you thinking? Standing there and doing fuck all! She could have fucking died, you could have at least done something, anything! You bastard idiot! When you fucking idiot wench of a girlfriend fell down the stairs, who was there Kakkorot? Who helped her? Me you fucking wanker! And you… You practically left her for dead!"_

"_Veg-" Bulma started weakly_

"_You've woken her up you idiot, get out!" Vegeta continued to yell._

"_Relax Vegeta."_

"_Shut up woman and just sleep."_

"_I would had my annoyingly over protective boyfriend now woken me up."_

_Goku waited at the window to see Vegeta fuss over the thing that was his life. He was sick with guilt, Bunny handed him a cup of coffee and sat next to him to hold his hand._

"_I wouldn't worry, Goku. Vegeta is very defensive at the best of times. Hell, I wasn't even allowed in the ambulance!"_

"Now," The priest began again, "At the request of Bulma we will listen to a song."

I always needed time on my own  
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry  
and the days feel like years when I'm alone  
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
When you're gone  
All the words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it okay  
I miss you

I've never felt this way before  
Everything that I do, reminds me of you  
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor  
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now

When you're gone.

We were made for each other  
Out here forever  
I know we were  
All I ever wanted was for you to know  
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul  
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me.

When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
The face I came to know is missing too  
All the words I need to hear to always get me through the day, and make it okay

I miss you.

Everyone by this point was in hysterics, even Bulma allowed her self to let three or four tears fall down her face and into her lap. She didn't wipe them away though, 'they go more unnoticed when you don't fuss over your face' she thought to herself.

The priest cleared his throat, "And now a few words from Bulma."

Bulma stood up and went up the few stairs so she had the whole room's attention. She cleared her throat, "I had written down everything I wanted to say, but I'll be honest if I look down I'm going to end up like a watering can and everything I've been sucking up to be the strong woman for my amazing husband will come out. Instead I'm going to speak from here," She pointed to her heart, "The only thing that is sure in life, is death. So in some ways you prepare yourself for things like this your whole life, but the truth is I could never prepare myself for this pain. In my heart" Her voice trembled as a tear crept slowly down her cheek, "He'd kill me if he could see me now." The crowd chuckled, "He was an individual, he was an arrogant, conceited prick. But he was mine. He made me everything I am today and... I will never forget him." She turned to the wooden coffin, placed her hand on his cheek through the photo and whispered, "All of the people in the world I never thought you'd be the one I wanted to be around when I was upset, but you were. You were never great with words, you always stumbled around wondering whether to say the right thing, or maintain your stupid attitude you had. But since you left me here all on my own, it feels like I haven't seen you in years, and I feel guilty for not remembering that voice that I always used to take for granted, shouting over you and getting mad at the bloody smirk of yours. My heart aches for you, Vegeta. It's awful that in all our time together it is at a time like this when I finally let my barriers down enough to let you know that I fucking love you. I'll never forget you, and I will miss you every single day of my life."

The priest played Vegeta's leaving song, and asked the pallbearers to take him to his final resting place. Bulma followed on behind again and then everyone filtered out of their seats. When they started to leave a very light rain began, Bulma gave a little smile. The place of burial was relatively close to the entrance and so they sat him down besides the grave.

"We therefore commit Vegeta Ouji-Briefs' body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust, in the sure and certain hope of the resurrection to eternal life."

The coffin was slowly lowered into the grave and as the rain began to get slightly heavier people squeezed Bulma's shoulder and gave her little hugs before going off to the pub with the others for the wake.

By the end, when the rain started to settle down it was just Chi-Chi, Goku and Bulma standing there.

Bulma sat down on the edge of the grave, he legs dangled over the hole and she saw the plaque on his coffin, shining brightly. She thought about getting in a laying on him, thinking fuck everyone else. She wanted to lay to rest with her husband, she didn't want to go on without him but she didn't get in. Instead, her friends perched next to her. Chi had a handful of cards in her hands, she roughly separated them into three and passed them along and they dropped one by one next and around his coffin.

"Do you remember when Vegeta first asked you out?" Chi asked.

"I'll never forget," She said with a smile, "We were just sixteen. You and Goku had been together forever and he was coming round to clean our pool as punishment from his Grandma for egging my Dad's car after me didn't let me go to the party he had invited me to. I purposely was out there tanning whilst he was getting all hot and sweaty trying to figure out how the equipment worked."

"Your pool was never dirty." Goku pointed out.

"I know, he had it done properly just before Vegeta arrived, but he left out a tooth brush and told him to put on a snorkel and shine every tile." Bulma cried and laughed at the same time, she had broken the seal, "He, he.. he said; you know you'll get skin cancer, and you'll deserve it for watching me slave away in this ridiculous heat without even offering me a lemonade." They all had a chuckle, "That's what he said. I got up without even thinking and pushed him in, he grabbed my arm and we ended up in each other's arms smiling and he said to me 'You know Kakkorot and the Wench seem to have thing sussed, be mine?... And we've been at each other's throats ever since."

By this time she was a mess, make up was everywhere. Everyone gave their own stories about him and they sat there until the sun had gone.

Eventually when Bulma walked through the door as she arrived home, she remembered that Vegeta always said that if he were around after life he would leave a sign. She searched everywhere for it. It finally lead her into the bathroom. She looked in the drawers and ended up crying on the toilet seat, through her fingers and tears she saw one of her emergency pregnancy tests. Not thinking much about it she decided to just do it.

3 minutes later,

"You fucking, brilliant and wonderful bastard!"

The end.

I hope you kind of enjoyed it, as far as funerals go. I kind of think it just ended, but it needed to eventually considering it was only a oneshot.

First attempt so please don't rip me to shreads!

**Let me know what you think?**

Thanks,  
DirtySpecs


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